Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Randomize
