Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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