I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
