No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize