you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
