and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
