Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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