Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
