Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
