Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
