Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
he quoted the bible to break up with me
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize