No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
