wat bout pragnant strippers??
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
