I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
