i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
