their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Randomize
