I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
