He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
