i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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