Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
