Do you still have your period?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
