i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
