I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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