when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
