I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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