You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
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