Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
