Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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