just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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