we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
either way he was missing a nipple.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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