He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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