all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
