My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Randomize
