WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize