Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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