Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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