Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
