Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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