Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
