sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Randomize
