If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
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