***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Randomize