i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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