Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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