I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Randomize