Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Randomize
