I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
