i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
