Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I should be sponsored by Trojan
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
