You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
