You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
